THERE’S ALWAYS TOMORROW…

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The night may not have been the best time you ever had. The previous day may have been the kind that makes you want to go back to bed and start over again … but in all fairness to the new day – there’s always tomorrow.

We are given the chance, with each new daybreak, to reinvent ourselves, to begin again with a clean slate. It is actually our own psyches that cause us to hold tight to the pains, hurts and disappointments of the previous day.

We supposedly keep that tight grasp as a means of ‘reflection’. It still astounds me that we never seem to reflect on the positives … on the gifts of light and love that have come our way during the 24-hour pass … only on the negatives.

We spend our nights – most of us – sifting through the sands of doubt and shame, hurt and anger, insecurity and fear, instead of saying to self and Maker that we vow to make it better tomorrow and paying tribute to the ones who have affected us in a good way.

We hoard every perceived injustice and as such we hand over our personal power to people who are in now way deserving of that privilege.

The actions of one vengeful, manipulative, sneaky and just plain malevolent human should not cause the tailspin that I have personally allowed to happen, but I did. It is my fault that I have allowed my own insecurities to cloud my joy and common sense … but allow it I did.

I now take the time to assure myself and others that there’s always tomorrow … and tomorrow and tomorrow.

Our opportunities for a clean slate are endless, yet we continue to swim in the current quagmire of choice…

The universe constantly sends us clues and reassurances, but in our chase of the illusive of yesterday we miss them.

Allow yourself the privilege of looking up and outward to tomorrow instead of holding on to and looking down at yesterday. Certainly, live in today, and live your best today. Crap happens, disappointments may very well occur, but remember that when everywhere else there are walls, magnets and nails holding you in this place of sadness and uncertainty, the sun will rise again …

Because there’s always tomorrow!

THE NECESSARY RANTINGS OF A WOMAN IN NEED OF PSYCHOLOGICAL & EMOTIONAL RELEASE

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They say that ‘no man is an island’ … well at this particular time of my life I feel like I’m sitting in the middle of a sea of misconception, mis-communication and as though I am being totally misunderstood.

I have been pouring my heart out to the ones nearest and dearest and I have come to realize after all of this time that NO ONE gets what I have been trying to say … absolutely no one …

Do you know how frightening that is to admit? I have been nothing but the voice of one who cries out in the wilderness … and as such, I have been offered nothing but platitudes and placebos as the means of healing that which ails me.

Ladies and gentlemen … me heart is broken at this point in time and I hurt in places that defy common sense — yet the only thing offered to me by those who supposedly know me best is ANYTHING WORTH HAVING IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR.

Here I stand … naked and vulnerable … exposed to the elements and all that is being given to me is TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS …

I am speechless in this time of confusion as I try to understand the ambiguous greeting that befell me this evening in the face of all oF my excitement about what was going on around me and I am told NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT IS GOING ON BUT YOU.

Is pain something that does not translate well? Is it that the ones that I have counted on thus far have no fucking clue about the pain that has engulfed my heart? Or is it that it is as I have always feared … they just really don’t care…

My heart is aching and I am swimming in a sea of platitudinous nonsensical words that do nothing but aggravate the case that holds dear my soul … I have come to this point of non-understanding via swimming in a tide of nonsense words and in the hope that I will be thrown off the scent of ones who just don’t get it …

I am tired of the words offered to me … the words that are offered as band aids for my broken me … words spewed at me in the belief that once they are uttered I would indeed shut the fuck up…

My heart is aching and here I stand in this place of labyrinth-like speech from people who should supposedly know better … from people whom I have opened myself up to … people whom I have shed my lifeblood for …
How stupid am I to always be so willing to give of self in the hope of receiving treatment in like …

Note to the universe:

I am tired … I am talked out and I am cried out…/ I have said all that I can and it is time for someone else to do the talking … I am all cried out and it is time for someone else to shed a tear … I have come to this place now of admitting the brokenness that swims around this heart of mine … there is nothing left in me … not at this time..

It is your time to admit that I have been wronged and it is your turn to admit that you need to fix it …

It is your turn to bring wholeness to this broken situation – though temporary it may be …

It is your turn to make this make sense … it is your turn Universe to bring me to a place of happiness and completion … I surrender to you … you win!

I am broken and though this is a temporary time of broken-ness … it is still real and I have no intention of just sitting by and accepting the platitudes and the fuckery that springs eternal from those round me …

I have been known to burn a bush or two in my ire and I feel the need to bring out ye ole extinguisher just in case I come to the point of total fedupness and irritation…

I am broken…

I seek solace and comfort … and I look forward to the explanations regarding the one who has caused my ire, my confusion and my need for clarity …
Wish me luck as I wait for what is due to me … involvement and clarity of mind …

Can someone be there for me just this once???

Thanks …

Ode to a Plague (a.k.a. Seriously? Really?)

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What right do you have
Saying things like that to me …
Bringing every buried insecurity
Back to the surface
Like black crude on salty sea?
Who the hell gave you permission
To unleash my salted tide of tears
You left this situation
You gave up claim
To this wonderful property
And so now it is that
Someone else sees the value
That is naturally inherent
In this yet properly harvested ground
You have decided to claim jump?
I – don’t – think – so
You see…
Due to circumstances beyond my control
I have taken up residence
On this chunk of fertile land
And I do not intend to leave it …
Nor do I share well
The opportunity to develop
What was left barren
Was yours
Yours!
In the palm of your hand
Yours!
And walk away you did
What you don’t realize
Is that this land was willed to me
Lifetimes ago
And you … you with your supposed hopes and dreams
And in actuality … you with your lies
Are nothing but a hiccup
In the game of Destiny
You are hereby dismissed
You are now officially evicted
This land, my darling, is my land
From sea to fuckin shining sea
For as far as the ‘I’ can see
And then back again
Yes, you planted a seed
And it bore a beautiful fruit
For that I am thankful
Yes you would always be connected to this land
Through that precious bud
But never assume that
Visiting that plant somehow
Erases the memory of ill use
And grants you your former leasing agreement
Because it doesn’t.
You are not now or will you ever be
Tenant at will
You will however
Fade back to the dust and darkness
From which you sprang
You who attempts to declare yourself as owner
You of the lost rights
And plans dashed
On the banks of your own insipidness
You who never understood
The gift that ownership of this fine land
Really ever meant
You who missed the joy of cultivation
Through your need to manipulate and scar
You who makes me thankful
For I have now come to the place
Where I can happily, honestly and truly
Reclaim that which is now and has always been
Mine.
And as such …
You are hereby asked to take your spite,
Your meanness, along with
The temporary key to the Pandora box
That is my insecurity
And graciously remove yourself
From my homestead.
Your presence is no longer
Desired or required.
Be gone!

At Last – Greaves launches novel

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This is another story done on my recently released novel…

The title of Donna Mae Greaves’ new novel—At Last—couldn’t be more apt. With the publication of the book, her first, she has realised a cherished dream and tasted the fruit of years of labour.

The book was launched on September 12 at the Audiovisual room of Nalis on Abercromby Street in Port-of-Spain. Friends and well-wishers gathered to witness the event and offered heartfelt testimonies to Greaves’ perseverance in the accomplishment of her goal. At Last is a Caribbean romance novel. The book was published by Soul Write publishing house in Tennessee, whose founder, Marquette Carney, was on hand to celebrate the occasion.

Greaves delivered two readings from the new work, selecting excepts from the beginning and end. The story was at once engaging, eliciting “oohs” and “ahs” from the audience. After the readings, the floor was opened to questions but, instead, those who took the microphone used the opportunity to congratulate the author. Many, such as opera singer Anne Fridal and actress Evelyn Caesar-Munroe, were close friends who had shared the journey to the book’s creation, over nearly five years.

They told of being asked to read new drafts and of lending shoulders and support while the book was being written. It was obvious that they shared in Greaves’ joy and felt a real sense of pride that the novel had been published. After the readings, Greaves signed copies of the book and guests partook of savoury and sweet treats, some of which were baked by Greaves herself.